follow your bliss

  • Permission to Grow

    Growth

    I’m reading Jen Sincero’s new book, You are a Badass at Making Money, which is a follow-up to her You are a Badassthe first book of hers that I read and loved. You can click on either of those titles to link to the book on Amazon. And no, I’m in no way affiliated with her, aside from knowing the truth when I see it, and wanting to share it with you good folks.

    Like any great read, within the first few pages, I was underlining sentences and phrases that resonated with me. Yes, I’m one of those people who highlights/underlines/writes in books with abandon and I’ve never given it a second thought. I don’t just read books, I immerse myself in them. I absorb them. I am changed by them.

    Here’s the first thing I underlined;

    “Desire literally means de sire, “of the father”, and whether or not you believe in God, your desires were bestowed upon you when you became your earthly self, along with other distinctive you-type things like your face and your personality and your affinity for needlecrafts.” 

    BAM! Not the needlecraft part, but definitely the de sire part. The things that light you up, make your heart smile, give you hope or a glimpse of the possibilities…your desires, those are what make life fun. When you’re living them at least. The problem being that so many people AREN’T living them. They deny themselves their desires. Their gifts from “the father”, if you will.

    We’ve been conditioned to look at our desires/wants/hopes/dreams as somehow less important or less valuable than whatever our reality is (or what we perceive it to be) at any given time.

    When it comes to your dreams and desires, have you ever told yourself,

    “maybe some day”

    or “it’s nice to dream but the reality is…”,

    or “work hard, be responsible, pay the bills, and then, and only then, maybe let yourself entertain the idea of what many consider “play”.

    Well here’s a friendly reminder from two Jen’s that your desires are as inherent and REAL and important as your mind, your body and your emotions.

    Here’s another humdinger I underlined:

    “We all have seeds of unthinkable badassery inside of us, yet only some of us will allow ourselves to grow.” Hmmmm…how’s that one feel? Let it sink in a little. Read it again.

    Feels like truth, doesn’t it?

    Sky's the limit
    Sky’s the limit

    I have two questions for you:

    1. What do you have inside you that you’re not allowing, accepting, embracing or bringing out into the light? That hidden desire that you’ve convinced yourself you don’t have time, energy, money, talent for.
    2. Why is it that you’re not giving yourself permission to grow, to allow your desires to come forward and show themselves to the world? Is it because you think you’re not worthy? Not talented? Not good enough? Now there’s a good one. Who hasn’t thought they weren’t good enough at some point in their lives? Who is thinking it now? I’m very familiar with that limiting belief myself. Gone several rounds with that one.

    Here’s a suggestion, grab a journal and a pen and jot down whatever is going through your head in response to those two questions. You can sit there and mull it over, which is great, but putting pen to paper (or even grabbing your phone and jotting down some notes) has an entirely different energy to it. This kind of stuff is exactly the kind of s#*t that is tripping you up, these negative thoughts and limiting beliefs. It’s what you need to get OUT OF your head and on to paper, or digital device whatever the case may be.

    It’s like clutter in your home, it gets in the way, it trips you up, makes a mess, serves no purpose – other than to keep you stuck.

    There’s great power in action. Big or small. You’ll never get to place of embracing your desires – your worthiness, your birthright to a happy, healthy, prosperous life – if you don’t dismantle these limiting beliefs that are preventing you from doing so.

    People often think they don’t know what their passion is, or what they truly want out of life. I believe we all know deep down, the problem is we’ve just forgotten. The answers are ALL within you. 100%. Sometimes it takes a little more work than we’d like to reconnect to our truth or our happy place within, but when we’ve spent a lifetime of unknowingly building layer after layer over our dreams, you don’t clear that s#*t over night. You do create a little more space with every layer you release though, and that makes the journey back to yourself sweeter with every step you take.

    Ok, it’s your turn…back to those two questions.

    I’ll be waiting to hear what you come up with….

    What makes you happy?

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    JEN

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  • The Hard Part of Follow Your Bliss

    Cup of coffee to start the day
    Morning coffee

    It’s Wednesday and I woke up feeling tired. It’s not exactly in line with my living mantra of Follow Your Bliss, but it’s real life.

    I’m often awake around 3-4am, but I think it was closer to 4:30 this morning because the birds were chirping. I managed to fall back asleep around 5:30 and slept til 8, which felt really late to me. Maybe that’s where my day went a little sideways. I wasn’t even out of bed and I was already feeling behind in my day. In hindsight, I should’ve just stayed put and let myself enjoy the space of nothingness. Or at least grabbed my journal and dumped the negative thoughts that were starting to pile up in my brain on paper so as not to completely derail my day.

    I jumped out of bed, made my coffee, and headed for the couch and my laptop. Big Mistake. Scratch that, not a mistake – because I don’t believe in mistakes or in doing things wrong – I believe everything happens for a reason and it all teaches us something if we’re willing to see the lesson. In it’s simplest form, it teaches us to not do that again, whatever that happened to be. We make a choice or a decision and there’s a result that comes from that decision, which we either like or we don’t. In my case, my choice to go right into work mode caused a ripple effect of….ERG! UGH! and F*#K! for lack of a better description.

    Today I’m yet again reminded of the life lesson (life lessons keep repeating themselves until we actually learn them and change the behaviour that causes them to appear in the first place) that it’s impossible to do it all and incredibly stressful to even entertain the idea.

    I’m a firm believer in the Follow Your Bliss mantra, so much so that it’s tattooed on my left arm in memory of my brother Steven. I know without a doubt that we are all here to bring our natural gifts forward to share with the world and light it up in a way that it’s never seen before. Each and every one of us has unique talents that the world will never see if we don’t believe in ourselves and share them – which means that the very people that need to hear your voice/see your creativity/resonate with your words – will miss out. YOU may be just what someone else needs in order to heal. That’s what Follow Your Bliss means to me.

    Follow Your Bliss tattoo on Jen's arm
    The tattoo

    The hard part of Following Your Bliss is the behind the scenes part that no one sees. Trying to learn a bunch of new things simultaneously, for example. In my case: web design, business card design, accounting software, marketing, branding, becoming savvier with your social media, email marketing, SEO, completing the courses and training that your new business is based on – health & wellness coaching, body language training certification, human behaviour courses and essential oils, preparing for new public speaking opportunities – always fun for those with any ounce of anxiety – and of course, the fear of putting yourself out into the world in a whole new way, just to name a few.

    It’s working all hours of the day, trying to juggle a gazillion moving parts and finding your way all on your own. The benefit to working for someone else is that you show up, you’re told what to do, you put in your day and then you go home. When you’re an entrepreneur, you’re on your own. There is no one there to tell you what to do and no user manual to guide you. However, I knew I couldn’t work for someone else which, by the way, is a key indicator that you too are an entrepreneur at heart if that resonates with you.

    It’s a powerful experience in trusting and having unwavering faith in yourself and there have definitely been times when my faith wavered. You need to have a burning passion and a ton of grit to see this through. I’ve laughed, I’ve cried (today as a matter of fact), I’ve taught myself more than I ever thought I could, and had times where I’ve never felt more alone (also today).

    This journey of Following Your Bliss is not for the faint of heart.

    Having said that, I’ve been blessed with incredible mentors along the way that have helped me immensely in my journey (that is, when I allowed myself to reach out for help).

    An amazingly patient and insanely talented young website designer named Daynna Hartjes A Daynna Life  helped me create this beautiful foundation from which everything else will be built upon.

    My very good friend and motivational guru, Shelli Varela Shelli Varela, who had me on her podcast (which was totally awesome) and is always ready to offer words of wisdom or a kick in the [email protected]* whenever I need it.

    The stunningly authentic and beautiful Tara Marino and the Elegant Femme community Elegant Femme, whose courses have been the catalyst for me in reconnecting to my truth and my bliss.

    Vanessa Van Edwards and Danielle Baker at Science of People where I received my certification as a Body Language Trainer along with a ton of knowledge and experience on going down the entrepreneurial path.

    These wonderful people brought me back to shore when my little boat, the SS Jenny, was adrift.

    Jen and husband looking at each other
    My rock

    Especially, my husband Earl.

    After deciding 4 hours ago that I was NOT going to do anything work related today because I recognized that insufferable feeling of swimming upstream and the need to walk away, I’ve just written an 1000 word blog. Is it really work related though? EVERYTHING ends up being work related on some level when you’re an entrepreneur. It’s either directly related to work or becomes inspiration for your work.

    I find writing to be cathartic, therapeutic, soul nourishing and stress relieving. It’s an opportunity to express my deepest thoughts, dreams, feelings and desires and hopefully connect with others through my words and perspectives. It’s both work and play, content creation and therapy, cultivation and bliss.

    It’s also – I’ve just realized – the easiest way for me to do the thing I’m trying so hard to do – inspire others by Following My Bliss.

    There is a flip side to everything we do in life. The yin and the yang, light and dark, expansion and contraction. What makes the path of Following Your Bliss different from the usual slog through life is that you’re Following YOUR Bliss rather than someone else’s.

    Jennifer sitting in the sun, following her bliss
    In my happy place – at home in the sun
    As tough as it gets, the inner light that’s guiding me shines bright enough to light even the darkest of times.

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