Inspiration

  • Step Into Your Power and Share Your Gifts

    Step Into Your Power and Into the Light

    The Right Words

    Step into your power. I’d scrawled these four words across the back of my hand in black pen while driving  home the other day after they’d appeared in my consciousness. I’d been mulling over a conversation  which had caused a powerful moment of awareness for me that I’d just had with the lovely young lady who does my lashes.

    We were having a spirited chat about the need to narrow down your niche and identify your target audience when starting a new business. I struggled with identifying my niche because I felt that I had 3 separate and distinct areas of interest, and couldn’t seem to bring them together. Everything felt disconnected, fragmented.

    My astute friend Olympia helped me realize that I was looking at it all backwards. I was struggling because I thought that my business had to be built on one or all of my areas of expertise (body language training, holistic wellness coaching, and/or speaking). I mistakenly believed that the services I offered-the ways in which I was able to assist others-were the foundation of my business and that I had to choose which one to focus on in order to identify my target audience.

    My Smile When I Step Into My Power

    The A-HA Moment

    The blindingly obvious A-HA moment occurred when I realized that you don’t build a business around what you do, you build it around who you are. I AM my business. My services or my areas of expertise are merely the tools through which I’m able to assist others. BAM!

    Much of my life I’d looked to the outside world for validation. Many times I thought that a particular job finally made me a “somebody”, or that it was being a firefighter that made me special or valuable. (Being a firefighter is an honour and a privilege and I’m very proud to be one, but it doesn’t define me or make me valuable. Being a human being makes me valuable and worthy.) Nothing external can provide the validation you’re looking for. That sense of self can only come from within.

    When I suddenly understood that I am it, that I am where my business starts and ends, I felt whole and complete on such a profound level. It felt like all the puzzle pieces of my life had finally come together. My job was to show up fully, every single day, everywhere I go. It wasn’t about being one person/persona/personality in one environment and a different one in another. (I’m not talking about false facades, I’m referring to my personal struggle with the dichotomy of strength (the firefighter) and soft (the pink loving, inspirational/spiritual/motivational posting girly girl). The aspects of me that seemed to be opposite and disjointed up until now.

    Step Into Your Power

    When the words STEP INTO YOUR POWER arrived in my mind/heart/soul/awareness that day, I had to reach for a pen and write them down on my left hand as I held the steering wheel. I knew they held great relevance in my life and although I didn’t fully comprehend the extent at the time, it has become clear in the days since.

    In working with an amazing brand strategist (Trust me. Look her up. Cherene Francis), those four words, STEP INTO YOUR POWER, came to life as she helped me connect the dots of my life experience in relation to my gift to share with the world.

    My struggle has always centred around a power imbalance, which started by having my power taken away from me at a young age by my older brother’s friends. It became a theme throughout my life. Jobs, relationships, family. It’s always been there. But now, now I lovingly see that it’s no longer my theme.

    When It All Comes Together

    My life experience, my professional experience, my thirst for knowledge and understanding-of myself and of others-my deep desire to help others and serve the world in a way that I’ve been gifted to do. They’ve all come together at 46 (47 in a week).

    This isn’t just my story. This is everyone’s story. We ALL have unique life experience, stories, struggles, and triumphs, which have created your own unique gift to bring into the world.

    The world is waiting for you to STEP INTO YOUR POWER!

    Step Into Your Power like Wonder Woman

     

     

     

     

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  • Inspiration Tip #3 of 3 Tips for Life Change

    The benefit of happy thoughts
    Me full of happy thoughts

    Inspiration Tip # 3

    Inspiration tip #3 for changing your life is all about the little voice in your head that is either lifting you up or dragging you down. Have you ever thought about HOW you talk to yourself? Are you hard on yourself? Critical? Negative? or generally upbeat,postivie and encouraging with yourself.  

    What’s your self talk like?

    I’m one of those constantly-in-my-head overthinking type people (I think it’s an introvert thing) and I’ve spent a lot of time working to get the upper handle on the little voice and it’s narrative. Fortunately for me, and hopefully you, inspiration hit me this morning on how to take back control of this little blonde maniac upstairs.

    My Epiphany

    My epiphany occurred when I realized that self talk comes down to being one of two things (negative or positive) and the trick is to interrupt the pattern when it’s negative. Gaining control over your self talk is really just a matter of conditioning yourself, much the way you condition yourself to eat healthier or exercise. You have to be consistent in your efforts, and like any other endeavour, change will come.

    Try this approach with your self talk; GO or NO GO.

    GO or NO GO

    You will have to monitor your thoughts throughout the day in order to apply this logic at first but over time it will become habit through something called muscle memory and you won’t have to think about it. All you really have to do is check in with yourself and with your thoughts. Since most of what we think is autopilot kind of stuff, we’re not even consciously aware of what we’re actually thinking about, or the extent to which our thoughts are controlling our actions and feelings. Having awareness of our thoughts, and if they’re negative or positive, gives us a sense of control right there.

    The Simple 3 Step Process

    Step 1

    When a thought comes up that doesn’t feel good (again, having the awareness of your thoughts is key so it’s important to check in with yourself) ask yourself, “is this thought a GO, as in, does it make me feel good?, or is it a NO GO, as in it makes me feel like sh*t. Or makes me feel yucky/uncomfortable/sad etc.

    If it’s good, make note of it. It’s helpful to be aware of how often you are thinking supportive, helpful thoughts because our thinking creates our feelings and we want to focus on feeling good. This would be a GO.

    If it’s a thought that creates any of the above noted feelings, it’s a NO GO. Call it what it is. Label it. Interrupt it. Most of our thoughts are just ingrained and automatic and we’re not always aware of them and what they’re actually doing to us. These negative, self limiting thoughts and thinking patterns were  created way back in our life experience due to an event that occurred, and that we attached a certain meaning to. It’s like a groove on a record (yes, I’m that old that I just used a record for an analogy). Reprogramming or reconditioning ourselves and our thinking patterns is like grabbing the needle and dragging it across a record. Did you just hear that? ZZZZZZZZZTTTTTTT

    We are interrupting the train of thought.

    DISRUPTING the thought pattern.

    Step 2

    If it’s a NO GO, congrats for recognizing that! You’re already a step closer to kicking it to the curb. Next you need to replace it with another thought. We’re reprogramming right? So you need to give your brain something else or it will just stick in it’s current, not-helpful-at-all groove. Find something kinder to say to yourself. If that’s a struggle see Step 3.

    Step 3

    Talk to yourself as if you were talking to a good friend. We get so caught up in the emotional attachment to who we think we are and what we think is true about ourselves that we lack the ability to be objective. Ask yourself, “what would I say to (insert name here) if they were stuck in the same rut?” You’ll be amazed at the wealth of helpful advice and supportive words you’d have for your friend that you wouldn’t have necessarily be able to reach for when talking to yourself.

    That’s it! I literally JUST came up with this so let’s all try it out and see if it works. If you DO give the 3 steps a try and you find that it does work, comment below or shoot me an email. I’d love to hear from you.

    Sunglasses and Inner thoughts

     

     

     

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  • Depression and Anxiety Do Not Have To Be A Life Sentence

    My Journey - Jennifer Grigg

    Five years ago I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder (it was MAJOR, and it was DEPRESSING and I was completely OUT OF ORDER), generalized anxiety disorder (yes, I was a little high strung…ok a lot…and…a lot of the time…and about pretty much everything), social anxiety disorder (so much for always blaming it on my introversion), PTSD (that one is a real bitch to deal with) and as if that wasn’t all bad enough, I was also gifted with something called PMDD premenstrual dysmorphic disorder (because PMS wasn’t enough, I apparently needed to super size it.) For some, receiving that info may have been devastating, but for me it was validation for why I’d endured a lifetime of low self worth, low self esteem and no self confidence….and REALLY hated parties and social gatherings of any and all types. Normal for introverts but this was extreme.

    I can make fun of it now, but that’s because I have enough distance from it to see it from a different perspective. A perspective that was absolutely not available to me during the better part of my life while I was deep into the quagmire of mental health issues.

    I deeply respect and fully appreciate the struggle of those who are going through any mental health issues/challenges/battles now and will absolutely hold space for any soul that reaches out to me. I get it. I’ve been there and done that. I looked into the abyss and if it weren’t for the two beautiful humans that I birthed into this world, I wouldn’t be here today. As much as I wanted the incessant torment and inner turmoil to end, I just could not leave them.

    The diagnosis served as acknowledgement from a mental health professional (a psychiatrist) and an explanation of why I always felt like I was inherently and hopelessly flawed. It all tracked back to a difficult childhood that I’d kept to myself until I was in my late 30’s. I had vehemently decided I’d take it to my grave rather than ever tell anyone. Little did I know, the memories that I’d buried so deeply started to bubble to the surface and demanded to be seen, felt, heard, relived and ultimately faced and released.

    Thus began the real journey… I’d been on and off antidepressants over the years (I’m med free and doing beautifully), I wrote and self published a book about my journey, I walked away from jobs – most recently my career highlight and most-money-I’ve-ever-made job (because ironically it didn’t fulfill me) with nothing other than a steadfast commitment to following my bliss – and I decided to start a coaching business from scratch. I left my job December 1, and have been busy building my business ever since.

    How I desire to be of service is this:

    I’ve learned to do things that I once thought were impossible. I want to help others do the same.

    Depression and anxiety do not have to be life sentences, we’ve just been conditioned to think they do.

    An unfulfilling job doesn’t have to hold you hostage, we just think it does.

    You can’t make money by just being you. Why not?? I’m out to prove this one wrong right now.

    I’m of the mindset that when I hear “you can’t do that”, whether it’s from someone else or my own mind talking trash, my automatic response now is, “Oh ya? Watch me.” 

    “When the voice on the inside becomes louder and clearer than the voices on the outside, that’s when you know you’re onto something good.” Dr. John Demartini.

     

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  • Permission to Grow

    Growth

    I’m reading Jen Sincero’s new book, You are a Badass at Making Money, which is a follow-up to her You are a Badassthe first book of hers that I read and loved. You can click on either of those titles to link to the book on Amazon. And no, I’m in no way affiliated with her, aside from knowing the truth when I see it, and wanting to share it with you good folks.

    Like any great read, within the first few pages, I was underlining sentences and phrases that resonated with me. Yes, I’m one of those people who highlights/underlines/writes in books with abandon and I’ve never given it a second thought. I don’t just read books, I immerse myself in them. I absorb them. I am changed by them.

    Here’s the first thing I underlined;

    “Desire literally means de sire, “of the father”, and whether or not you believe in God, your desires were bestowed upon you when you became your earthly self, along with other distinctive you-type things like your face and your personality and your affinity for needlecrafts.” 

    BAM! Not the needlecraft part, but definitely the de sire part. The things that light you up, make your heart smile, give you hope or a glimpse of the possibilities…your desires, those are what make life fun. When you’re living them at least. The problem being that so many people AREN’T living them. They deny themselves their desires. Their gifts from “the father”, if you will.

    We’ve been conditioned to look at our desires/wants/hopes/dreams as somehow less important or less valuable than whatever our reality is (or what we perceive it to be) at any given time.

    When it comes to your dreams and desires, have you ever told yourself,

    “maybe some day”

    or “it’s nice to dream but the reality is…”,

    or “work hard, be responsible, pay the bills, and then, and only then, maybe let yourself entertain the idea of what many consider “play”.

    Well here’s a friendly reminder from two Jen’s that your desires are as inherent and REAL and important as your mind, your body and your emotions.

    Here’s another humdinger I underlined:

    “We all have seeds of unthinkable badassery inside of us, yet only some of us will allow ourselves to grow.” Hmmmm…how’s that one feel? Let it sink in a little. Read it again.

    Feels like truth, doesn’t it?

    Sky's the limit
    Sky’s the limit

    I have two questions for you:

    1. What do you have inside you that you’re not allowing, accepting, embracing or bringing out into the light? That hidden desire that you’ve convinced yourself you don’t have time, energy, money, talent for.
    2. Why is it that you’re not giving yourself permission to grow, to allow your desires to come forward and show themselves to the world? Is it because you think you’re not worthy? Not talented? Not good enough? Now there’s a good one. Who hasn’t thought they weren’t good enough at some point in their lives? Who is thinking it now? I’m very familiar with that limiting belief myself. Gone several rounds with that one.

    Here’s a suggestion, grab a journal and a pen and jot down whatever is going through your head in response to those two questions. You can sit there and mull it over, which is great, but putting pen to paper (or even grabbing your phone and jotting down some notes) has an entirely different energy to it. This kind of stuff is exactly the kind of s#*t that is tripping you up, these negative thoughts and limiting beliefs. It’s what you need to get OUT OF your head and on to paper, or digital device whatever the case may be.

    It’s like clutter in your home, it gets in the way, it trips you up, makes a mess, serves no purpose – other than to keep you stuck.

    There’s great power in action. Big or small. You’ll never get to place of embracing your desires – your worthiness, your birthright to a happy, healthy, prosperous life – if you don’t dismantle these limiting beliefs that are preventing you from doing so.

    People often think they don’t know what their passion is, or what they truly want out of life. I believe we all know deep down, the problem is we’ve just forgotten. The answers are ALL within you. 100%. Sometimes it takes a little more work than we’d like to reconnect to our truth or our happy place within, but when we’ve spent a lifetime of unknowingly building layer after layer over our dreams, you don’t clear that s#*t over night. You do create a little more space with every layer you release though, and that makes the journey back to yourself sweeter with every step you take.

    Ok, it’s your turn…back to those two questions.

    I’ll be waiting to hear what you come up with….

    What makes you happy?

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    JEN

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